Conversations with a Gullible Toddler

Am I a Bad Mother?

I had an interesting conversation with The Frog the other night. And made sure to transcribe it - you forget these things as the years go by...

I was just relaxing back into a hot bath when my hopes for some peace and quiet were pulverized by this one little sentence:

The Frog: MOM! WHERE ARE YOU???

I stay very very quiet.

The Frog: MOM!!! WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!

The Man: She's in the bath!

(Thanks love)

The Frog - at the door: Mom, you in there?

I ignore it in a last desperate attempt at regaining that peace and quiet...

The Frog: Mom, you in there?

And this is where I had my diabolical idea.

Me: No...

The Frog: Where are you?

Me: At the library.

The Frog: At the library? (why-bweh-wee...?)

Me: Yes, my darling.

The Frog: At the library?


(He repeats himself while he is thinking of his next sentence...)

Me: Yes my darling...

The Frog: At the library?

Me: YES, my darling!

The Frog: Where is the library?

Me: Far away.

The Frog: Across the road?

Me: Yes, across the road.

The Frog: Be careful of the cars!

Me: Ok, baby.

The Frog: And stop at the red light!

Me: Yes, sweetheart.

The Frog: And go when it's green.

Me: Clever boy!


(By now I'm enjoying the entertainment.)

The Frog: You going to the Library?

Me: Yes, my sweetheart.

The Frog: With the fishies?


(Our library has a pretty cool tank of goldfish)

Me: Yes...

The Frog: And the dancing? (Dancing)

Me: And the dancing...

The Frog hears the water in the bath...

The Frog: Mom, you in the bath?

Me: No.

The Frog: Who is in there?

Me: A monster. (Bad mommy! BAD mommy!)

The Frog: A monster? (You can hear the anxiety in his voice...)

Me: Yes, a monster

The Frog: I'm scared!

Me: Don't worry, when I pull the plug out it will go down the drain.

The Frog: It will go down the drain?

Me: Yes baby.

The Frog: Ok...

Kids are so gullible.

Why yes... Yes, I do train them well.

Yes...

 And young.

Proverbs 22:6

Go look it up.

Vacuuming at the age of 2 is biblical.

Froggie Numeracy - Phoning Granny

 The Frog is two.

I keep telling you all that, I'm sorry...

But anyway, lately it's been rather interested in numbers. And, in the absence of handy cash for preschool fees or resources to reallyteach him well here at home, I've been trying to come up with ideas as to how to take advantage of the interest...

One way is to get him to dial numbers for me when I need to phone out.





His favourite is his grandmother's number. He just about knows it off by heart now.

Because it's become a game, you see.

Luckily, Granny doesn't mind 17 phone calls a day, and...
luckily, it's free to call her number.

Why he's using his pinkie to do it is beyond me!

And the smile when she answers the phone is worth the patience required!

Jord - the 8-year old Kitchen Prodigy!

Photographic evidence!

 Jord asked if he could cook dinner. He has been asking for a while now, so I got a kid-friendly cookbook out of the library...

This one.

Highly recommended!

I can see you cringing... I was too!

 Uh huh! Wait til the last photo...

 Just to clarify - I did nothing, except stand back and tell him what to do.

And hand out the plasters...

Wait for the last photo.

Oh, and open the can. We have a horrible can opener!

Looking good...

 He made dinner just for him and The Frog.

Ours was in the back pot and the slow cooker in earlier photos.
Lamb Stew.

The Man preferred Jord's food!
The cheek.

Plating for The Frog.

Such a great brother!

 And then for himself - every detail HAD to be perfect!

Perfection!

That grin actually looks scary for some reason.

Did I Photoshop you too much child?

Note the plaster - from grating the carrot.

But, heck - he cooked!

Froggie painting a rock.

Yay! Something to do!

Is this gween mom? Is this gween???

I love this munchkin.

Just in case I haven't told you that before...

The little fingers!

 Look how hard he is trying to 'hold' the rock...

Are we learning dexterity here?

And the concentration on his face...

I love it!

It's so cute!

 See?

The face and the fingers, get me everytime.

I can watch this for hours.

Really - who needs more than an old margarine lid for a paint palette anyway?

Frog's Bedtime Prayers with Daddy

Tonight, The Frog lead The Man in prayer.

The Frog: "Repeat after me."
"Dear Lord Jesus"

The Man: "Dear Lord Jesus"

The Frog: "Please help me to be a good boy for mommy!"

The Man: "Please help me to be a good boy for mommy."

The Frog: "AMEN!"

The Man: "Amen." With a grin...



Oh, I hope they both meant it...

Christmas Window Shopping

You know those REALLY annoying brochures that clog up your letterbox, advertising sales on items that you can't really afford anyway?

I found a use for them.



.




I told Jord (who is off school because of the tummy bug we've been dealing with all weekend) that his job was to find three things in these brochures for each person in the family, that he thinks they might like for christmas. He was then to cut them out and glue them into his project book and list the cost of each item in the column next to it.

 And then add it all together...

I'm hoping this teaches him three things:

1. It's a maths exercise. He has to add...

2. He has to think about what other people might like for christmas, not only himself.
3. He realises that christmas costs alot of money!

Cricket Diagnostics

The Man in action!

The Man and I found these photos rather fascinating for completely different reasons.

Both diagnostic.

He was critically examining his form while bowling. I have no idea what he was saying, but it made sense to him.

I was horrified at how off my horizons were. In a few of these photos my husband is bowling uphill...

Isn't he gorgeous though?

This is the 'field of play' - I was messing with my aperture setting.

I got the grass in focus...

That's got to count for something right?

Team huddle after The Man bowled someone out.

For about 20 runs.

I don't recall the details.

I just liked watching The Man, those rare moments that my children allowed me to.