Tuesday, 5 April 2011

The Messy House Ministry

Credit: Sanja Gjenero, sxc.hu
I don't know if I can truly call my messy house a ministry, surely a married person in a ministry should be married to someone similarly called?

I'm giggling as I write this... because The Man does not share my views on messy houses being ministries to those oppressed by the same, and to be perfectly honest with you, I would prefer my house to be neat and tidy and organised.

I would prefer to have a place for everything and everything in it's place. But the reality is this:
My children do not know how to tidy up after themselves. (Which is my fault)

Clutter spots have formed in strange places like the hatch between the playroom and the kitchen and the ironing board. (Shows you how much I use that!)

Laundry lies in piles all over the floor - the only organisation there is inside my own head, in that, I mostly know which pile is clean.

But the difference between The Man's perspective and mine is this: I am the primary caregiver for two boys, aged eight and three, and an eight week old baby girl. I've given up.
It is the epitome of chaos.

I have lowered my standards to this:

We're doing ok if -
Everyone has clothing to wear.
Cooking food in my kitchen will not cause widespread stomach upsets.
The dishwasher gets turned on at least once a day.

I turn a blind eye to -
My unswept kitchen floor and unvacuumed lounge.
The bin (not my job!)
The boy's bedroom floor (also not my job!)
A messy playroom (yet again... not my job)

Unfortunately our untidy house with it's crumbs on the floor bothers my husband and he finds it disturbing that other people see the house in this state.
He doesn't believe in a messy house ministry and will devote large amounts of time on the weekend to cleaning.

I love him dearly for this and feel beyond blessed to be married to him.

I do have faith that eventually one day the rhythm of my household will settle down and that the pace of my daily life will become less frantic. And I'm fairly sure that, when this happens, my standards will rise.
My home will become a place of calm and peace. Where my husband will come home and relax in it's serene atmosphere.

I wouldn't hold my breath though. 'Cos I'm also fairly sure it ain't gonna happen any time soon.


  1. Kerryn du Plessis5 April 2011 at 23:16

    I can totally relate...also totally my fault for not being more strict about Chloe cleaning up after herself. The mess probably annoys me more than it does Brad. He's quite great about it in fact. I remember when Jenna was a few weeks old and I'd had a bad day, he said "Both kids are alive, that means you're doing a great job" :) I'm sure visitors don't mind the mess...especially if they are moms too.

  2. To be totally honest with you...I have noticed this....(in my household anyway)..

    Clean house.....grumpy children
    Messy house.....happy content children.. Why??

    Because I stress so much when I want the house clean...or when the house IS clean, and the kids are growled for dropping this here...leaving lego there... I send them into the room to play.

    When I chill out and let them bring some things out into the lounge where I am crafting or working or whatever, then they are so much happier...Im not stressing at them.. and actually I am a nicer being.

    Unfortunately hubby doesn't understand this concept yet... lol he always likes the house looking nice and spotles...lol ..
    solution?? Let him do the clean up then!! lol


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